What to do when you experience Sudden and Tragic Hair Loss: How to Grieve, Accept, and Heal

    Growing up as a young girl, HAIR was something i took pride in.  HAIR was to me one of the many founding reasons why girls were jealous, why i had confidence and it was what i had groomed for years. I took pride in having long, natural, and  healthy hair, that was something i always had until the year 2012. Needless to say 2012 was an awful year for me. It got even worse when all of my hair fell out.

December 2012. Photo Captured in the Fashion District.

   In the year 2010, while I was in High School, I decided to cut my long hair into a short hairstyle. I always had different hair styles practically every five minutes of my life lol  Eventually, I decided to let my hair grow back in without any chemicals, heat etc. I did this by going into protective hair styles ( quick weaves ,braids, sew- ins etc...) During my freshman year of college I decided to officially stop wearing weave because my hair was once again back to being long, healthy and beautiful. It took me 2and a half almost 3years for it to grow back .  I then took things with my hair a step further and colored it a beautiful copper penny auburn color.  Even after coloring it my hair was still long and healthy!

December 2012.  Hair stopped in the middle of my back and continued to grow.

In December 2012 I decided to go on vacation in LosAngeles, CA to visit relatives. One of these relatives was an aunt. My aunt had obtained her hair license years before i was even though of. Hair was once a passion and job of hers. Uneducated on hair and determined to get what I wanted, I wrongfully convinced her to put a relaxer in my hair not really paying attention to the fact RELAXERS AND HAIR COLOR ON AFRICAN AMERICAN HAIR DOES NOT MIX. Long story short, totally aware of the consequences soon to occur, my aunt gave me the relaxer and ALL OF MY HAIR FELL OUT. 

The beginning of a long journey of Depression and Insecurity:

           As i washed the relaxer out of my hair, I witnessed clumps and clumps of hair coming out and falling into the sink. I completely freaked out, crawled into the bath tub, sobbed, and cried to my mother informing her on what had happened. The next day I booked a flight to come home and the day after I was at LAX boarding a that very flight.  I instabtly HATED my aunt because during my stay for the "vacation" , she was awful to me for her own personal reasons. The simple fact she has her hair license yet gave me a relaxer anyway made me strongly believe she did that on purpose to hurt me. I eventually grew to forgive her but i could not  initially do that until I accepted the situation and felt comfortable in my own skin. Honestly, I didn't have any emotional  support and comfort from  my family that I desperately needed. I felt no one sympathized enough for me to feel like they truly cared. Their whole attitudes was just like " well its just hair" and at the time, in the midst of tragedy i didn't understand that. Not only did this happen but it happened in my early years of college! whomp whomp whooooomp lol

Eventually I was forced to do the "Big Chop" because of how bad the breakage, damage, and sheading was. This big chop made it impossible for me to keep my hair in any hairstyle because of how short my hair was cut down to be.  My hair was not long enough to grip for braids nor to cover tracks of a quick weave.  

On my way back home December 2012, I ran into Rapper Wiz Khalifa . Atleast something good came out of that emergency flight lol

  I endured my whole freshman year being insecure and self conscious because my hair fell out.  Luckily for me I have a good grade of hair and it grows back fast.  Unfortunately it seemed to take forever and a day for my hair to grow but any other time it would grow back quicker lol Honestly, it was hard but  maintaining inner strength and seeing growth of my hair as the months went on was the only two things that lightened the hurt, embarrassment, and depression. I remember the summer after freshman year, i wore scarfs on my head the ENTIRREE summer. Till this day you wont catch me in a head scarf because that experience turned me off of them. I go to hats. Hats are Nice.😎

This is a weave that i got put in after my hair fell out. The hair
stylist knew me for years and was so rude and insensative to
my situation. Till this day i have NOT and WILL not go to
her for hair services ever again.LESSON LEARNED.

Photo taken a few days after i came home from LA.

                             After the summer had passed, I entered my Sophmore year of college. My hair now was long enough to grip up for braiding and I could now get a sew-in. I wore my hair with weave in sew-ins the first half of my Sophmore year. During March 2014 I decided to chop my hair off once again and wear it short. By this time I had realized that I let hair define who I was instead of just having fun with it. I now color my hair ( using no relaxers!!!) and keep it short. Bantu knots are my best friend and I do my own hair now! I can flat iron, curl,and style my hair how I prefer now. I'm not insecure over my hair anymore and I believe that ended when I decided to cut my hair into a short hairstyle. I accepted the fact all of my hair fell out and I owned the short hair look ..ONCE AGAIN :) It is possible to regain your power and not let your insecurities leave you insecure, scared, and paranoid. Hair no longer owns me, I OWN IT and express myself through my hairstyles. I go from short to long to long to short hair whenever I please ! 

HAVE FUN WITH YOUR HAIR AND OWN YOUR LOOK! EMBRACE YOUR STYLE AND WEAR IT BETTER THAN ANY OTHER!! (Spring 2014) !!